I am out of my comfort zone.  It’s ok.  But it’s like learning to write your name with your left hand if you are right handed.  Try it.  It’s hard.  you have to think about it.

Hopefully, by now, dear reader you have figured out my true passion.  I believe in funeral service and I believe in funeral directors…most funeral directors any way.

What has me out of my comfort zone is this:

Our profession is broken and I want…desperately want…to help fix it.  But I am like you.  I like being nice.  I like being liked. I like being respected.

I have spent years trying every thing I could think of to open your eyes and help you see first what needs to be done and second how to do it.  In effect, how to fish.  But I wasn’t moving the needle.

Then I began to notice that many of the “Pied Pipers” you so avidly listen to weren’t as kind and gentle as I try to be.  In fact, they are downright rude and often demeaning.  So, I thought: “OK, I don’t like it but I will try it.”  and BINGO it worked.

I shared my perplexity with an old industry friend.  He told me why it worked.

It turns out that you share all my same frustrations. You are neither blind nor stupid. but you don’t realize that you…YES YOU…are part of the problem.  So, on those occasions when I am rude and confrontational you think I am talking about everyone else and, in your mind, you are saying: “yes! Give it to ’em!”

But, I am talking about all of you…or better…all of us.  I don’t like talking (writing) in a confrontational style but if that is what it takes for you to listen then I will.

But you are not innocent.  You cannot remain the same.  You CANNOT put new wine into old wine skins. You must learn to do new things in new ways.  You must stop listening to the “pied pipers” with “dogs in the hunt” and just dressing up yesterday’s business model.  Quit it…will you?

It’s your livelihood. It’s your future.

Futility is a sad way for you to end a career. It is neither over, nor too late. There are things you can do to change the trajectory your business is on. Given the nature of human beings only a few will actually do it. But those who are able to re invent themselves will enjoy renewed prosperity and, best of all, have fun. BTW, be careful not to throw the babies out with the bathwater. Some of the things you do are good, very good. Differentiating the important from the obsolete is the key.

If I die on this hill, so be it. What hill are you willing to die on?