Why We Fail: How Blame Game Defeats Us

When will we stop fighting AMONG ourselves and start fighting FOR ourselves?
When will we stop fighting AMONG ourselves and start fighting FOR ourselves?

Why is it so important in the funeral service culture to find blame? Blame is always a counterproductive force that slows us down and PREVENTS us from the personal accountability we need to move us to a higher plane.

Some years before my engagement with funeral service I was employed as a project manager and problem solver for a company that salvaged distressed companies. One day one of those companies was in danger of losing its largest customer because someone had made a mistake. My boss (one of the owners) called me in to “solve the problem” and save the customer. I set about doing just that. It involved an extra shift and weekend work to get it all done in the time frame necessary. At one point my boss called me in to ask who was to blame for the problem. I told him I didn’t know (apparently I was supposed to know) and he got angry. I responded by saying something like: “Let’s solve this problem and save the customer and we can worry about who did it later.” At that his face became red and his lips pursed. I knew we were close to a blow up because he wanted someone to blame. At the same time we were just hours away from shipping and it was looking like we might save the customer. I don’t remember how I did it but I somehow got back to work without having to figure out who was to blame.

My point is now, more than 30 years later, I am still mystified by why blame was more important than rectifying and salvaging the situation. Yet, in my career I have learned that blame is the first reaction most people have to trying circumstances. In some segments of funeral service the need to blame is almost pathological.

I saw this 3 minute video the other day and it says so much better anything I could possibly say that I wanted to share it with you. Seems to me the question we should ask ourselves is: “Do you want a scapegoat or do you want to see your darn revenue go up?”

Enjoy

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