What is an Intentional Funeral Director?

Some years ago I attended a Men’s Retreat at my church.

The plan was that we would all ride to the camp on the church bus. What the pastor told us before we climbed on board set the whole tone.

He said:

“Some people rise above their circumstances and some people see themselves as victims… for the next two days…no matter how real or reasonable the reasons for our circumstances we will make no excuses.”

That’s a lot harder than it sounds. Things happen and sometimes we really don’t have control but here is what we all learned:

When you allow yourself to make excuses you don’t take personal responsibility. When you don’t take personal responsibility, after a while, you start to see yourself as a victim…the result is often anger, self – pity, and, because you have self – identified as a victim, you begin to think you have no hope. And when you think you have no hope, nothing is your fault, you actually begin to learn to like your circumstances.

Intentional people act with intention. They never let themselves think like a victim. Yes, they get angry and experience disappointment and frustration. But they are deliberate and intentional about their future. They may not know what to do or, even, how to do it but they know that they can’t stay where they are.

Intentional people tend to be learners. They may or may not seek higher education. But they are always learning… what works and doesn’t work. They seek mentors and read and ask questions. They ask why and why not?

Intentional people see assumptions and paradigms as challenges. Are they true? if so, ok. If not what else can we do?

Intentional people tend to see from an “abundance” perspective: “What can I gain.” Scarcity is the prevailing perspective in funeral service: “What can I lose.” It is interesting that intentional people tend to be generous with others and love to see others grow and succeed too.

Intentional people want to have a plan. Even though they understand that plans rarely survive contact with reality, plans help them compare and contrast so they can make adjustments.

Intentional people want to have goals, short and long term. They want to know they aren’t standing still.

Intentional Funeral Directors are the ones who keep us moving in the right direction