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5 Ways To Breathe Life Into Your Business

Written by Alan Creedy on . Posted in The Creedy Commentary, The Video Blog, Video, Video Gallery. 2 Comments on 5 Ways To Breathe Life Into Your Business

This week I was privileged to be interviewed by Sebastian Thalhammer of Austria. You may or may not have heard of Sebastian but he is a pretty interesting media guru who somehow decided I had something to say. So, Here is my “15 minutes of fame.”

Actually, it’s 45 minutes but it does have some interesting insights on how to compete more effectively and some resources you can access to help you do it.

Get yourself a cup of coffee…or a beer, relax and learn something.

Here is what I would do:

This interview may inspire some dialogue in your business. If I were you I would schedule a staff meeting, bring in some popcorn, cast the video onto one of your monitors (I know you have them). After you finish it these questions might spark a positive dialogue:

  1. What were Alan and Sebastian saying about the market that we are seeing?
  2. How could we respond or assimilate to realize a competitive advantage?
  3. What could we do that might make an impact today?
  4. What should we be planning for today that will make a difference by next year?
  5. Who will do it?

Esse Quam Videri

Written by Alan Creedy on . Posted in The Creedy Commentary, General Topics. 3 Comments on Esse Quam Videri

I have to admit I tense up whenever someone begins using the Ritz Carlton as an example Funeral Service should use to fashion its own customer service profile.  Not that we can’t learn some things from the Ritz.  We most certainly can!  But it is a dangerous recommendation when we fail to “Go Deep” on the pain and effort it took for the Ritz to get to that level of service.  Another example of mistaking form for substance.

I have now lived in North Carolina for almost 28 years.  Within a year or so of arriving I noticed that the state motto is “Esse Quam Videri” which is latin for:

“To Be Rather Than To Seem”

I can’t find anyone who knows the genesis of that motto but I like it and have adopted it for my own.  It’s a good standard and it’s good to have a standard.  Especially when you fail to meet it. And that is really the story of the Ritz Carlton.

All too often we see something that works somewhere and we adopt what we see without really understanding the substance behind it.  For the past 20 years I have witnessed many main line denominational churches send committees out to study the exploding megachurch movement.  All come back with the outer cosmetic trappings. They change the music and often the ambiance but they never get to the deeper essence of what is really causing those churches to grow the way they do.

In the mid 1980’s, on behalf of my clients, I made a case study of the Ritz Carlton.  They were then, as they are now, extremely gracious.  It was entirely open book.  I was introduced to the whole story of blood, sweat and tears or rather the herculean 10 year single-minded effort of Horst Schulz and his merry band of executives as they set about changing the culture of the Ritz.  No small effort.

And that is really my point.  Adopting “country club manners” was only the visible part.  The focus and intentionality of achieving their vision was, by far, the most impressive.  You see, it is not enough at the Ritz Carlton to ACT like a lady or a gentleman.  You must actually BE a lady or a gentleman.  And that is the key to any successful organizational change.

Your DNA must change

My wife and I have become addicts of Masterpiece theater’s “Downton Abbey“.  In the presence of the Lords and Ladies the “help” puts on their best face.  But downstairs in the servant’s work area they are as dysfunctional as any funeral home staff I have ever met.  At the Ritz that would not be tolerated.  The turnover rate at the average hotel (luxury or otherwise) is startling high.  The Ritz turnover is a fraction of the industry average but it is still about 25%.  That is partly because at the Ritz if you can’t BE a lady or gentleman…you simply can’t stay.

Click here for a copy of the Ritz Carlton Values Card

Click here for a copy of the Ritz Carlton Baldridge Award Application

Why Families Seem Ruder Today and Some Tips on How To Respond

Written by Alan Creedy on . Posted in The Creedy Commentary. 3 Comments on Why Families Seem Ruder Today and Some Tips on How To Respond

Funeral Directors are increasingly distressed about being treated rudely by families. This rudeness often causes practitioners to lose control of vital conversations at critical moments.  Industry vendors know that Funeral Directors can be very rude as well.   In my opinion the reasons both are rude is fundamentally the same.

And Yes! Funeral Directors can be very rude when they want to be.

This is very important because it is causing a lot of Funeral Directors to lose control in conversations with the public when they should be in control (in control as opposed to taking control).

For several years now we have seen an increase in dysfunctional families in the arrangement conference.  THEY are not in agreement so we struggle to reach consensus.  Emotions run high and we wear ourselves out trying to keep a lid on the scene.

The reason things get out of control is that we are more focused on the content (making arrangements and making them meaningful) and we fail to understand we are equally responsible for influencing the conditions (how people are interacting, body language, etc.)  The one thing, manifested in a myriad of ways, that throws that monkey wrench every time is fear.  So what you are looking for is signs that people are feeling unsafe.  Many funeral directors are relatively adept at this.  It is the new levels of rudeness that is taking them off guard.  They make the mistake of taking it personally rather than seeing it for what it is:  A defense mechanism.

We don’t need to go into all the reasons for feeling unsafe in an arrangements conference or at a funeral.  But people tend to react to this feeling in one of two ways: Silence or Violence.  It is up to you, dear director, to be alert to either of these and recognize and respond to them early.  Rudeness can be classified as violence most of the time but it has a silent mode and that’s the one funeral directors employ so often.

Your job is to create and periodically restore a sense of safety to the conversation.  The first step is to recognize the signals and then the second is to kick your brain into gear and bring everyone back into safety.  Sometimes that takes backbone.  If some one is cussing you out it might be a good tactic to suggest another funeral home might serve their needs better.  Many times humor can work better.  Try to stop talking, look directly at your troublemaker and say something silly like: “Was that your cat I stepped on on the way in?”  and then, of course, shut up.  Maybe suggesting a time out will bring people to the realization they are behaving like children.

Silence and violence have three forms each:

Silence

  • Masking
  • Avoiding
  • Withdrawing

Violence

  • Controlling
  • Labeling
  • Attacking

So what does this have to do with why funeral directors can be rude?

Funeral directors tend to be nice people.  They avoid conflict and confrontation like the plague and hate delivering bad news.  Often they employ rude techniques when dealing with vendors they don’t want to work with. Delivering bad news takes them out of their comfort zone.   They miss appointments, keep people waiting, forget to show up, never return phone calls.  They hope the guy will get the message without realizing the damage done to their own reputation.  If you work long in funeral service you get used to this and realize it is just part of the game we have to play.  In life you have to take the good with the bad.  What most funeral directors don’t realize is that a polite “No” is a kinder and gentler act than the avoidance / withdrawal behavior so often manifested by some of our best practitioners.  Yes, I realize there are vendors who are overly persistent but that just means you need to be a little more assertive yourself.

P.S.  You and your staff can master handling “High Risk” conversations in a course I can deliver for your staff at your funeral home:

“Conversations That Matter”: How to Build Consensus and Relationships Through Positive Communication

Are Funeral Directors “wired” to Lose in The “New Normal” Part 3

Written by Alan Creedy on . Posted in The Creedy Commentary. 1 Comment on Are Funeral Directors “wired” to Lose in The “New Normal” Part 3

Last week in part 2 of this series we learned that “Challengers” don’t educate,  they teach.  They are not afraid of pushing their customers  to think in new ways.  We also learned that while people may like those who are nice to them, they like those who help them gain new insights even more.

But none of this helps unless we know how they do it.

Challengers, by definition, know more about the product and process than their clients, and so do you.  They realize that most people approach a new or unfamiliar purchase with a distorted paradigm.   So, their objective is to help the customer gain a new perspective on the product or service.   It may seem counter-intuitive,  but the goal is not to have the client say: “I completely agree.” Rather, success is achieved when the client says: “I never thought of it that way.”  Reflection, not agreement, is the goal.

Here is how I would approach developing this skill:

1. I would not start with my most challenging cases.  I would practice with customers I already felt I had rapport with.

2. My goal would never be to convince but to open a new thought pattern by sharing new insights from my experience.  As an example, last week I mentioned my response to scattering ashes.

3. I would create a “safety zone” to retreat to if things got out of hand

4. I would not probe for customer needs.  There isn’t enough time to provide that much insight.  Rather, I would tell the client what I normally see with similar families and how the right choice made a difference.  This should not be aggressive but assertive enough that it pushes them a little out of their comfort zone.

5. I would provide several options that are appropriate; but I would also share pitfalls.

6. I would use the dreaded “R” word and work with my colleagues to practice scenarios.  “R” stands for ROLEPLAY!.  Sorry if I shocked you.   Roleplay is out of the comfort zone of most practitioners.  But if you are going to be a true professional it is the price that you have to pay.

Here is how to create a “Safety Zone”:

1. Acknowledge the importance

2. Ask permission

3. Make a reasonable suggestion

AND MOST IMPORTANT: BE VULNERABLE YOURSELF.  IN OTHER WORDS BE AUTHENTIC.  If you can’t be authentic you probably ought not to change what you are doing.

Here is how I might approach the conversation.   After the warmup and before making arrangements I would acknowledge the importance by saying something like:

“Most people I work with only make arrangements once or twice in their lifetime.  Taking care of [relationship of deceased “your dad”] is one of the most important decisions you can make in your lifetime.  There is lots of room for regrets by doing too much or too little.   I will do my best to help you honor [your dad] in a way that meets your needs and your budget.  But sometimes the conversation can get a little awkward.  In fact, sometimes I feel a little awkward but my goal is that you have no regrets.  Is that ok?”

By doing this up front, when things get awkward you can say, “I realize this is uncomfortable but let’s at least explore this so you make an informed decision. Remember my goal is no regrets”

For instance, you are serving the family of a 55 year old man with teenage children,  He was an active member of the community and popular among his fellow employees at work.  You know from experience that there will be a large turnout.  The family has selected a private viewing with an hour’s visitation prior to the service.  The choice is partly economic.   They could accomplish something more at close to the same price by reducing the quality of vault and casket (Now I am feeling awkward).  You could say:

“(name of deceased) was well known and liked.  My experience is telling me that an hours visitation won’t work and here is why (fill in the blank with your experience).  We have a couple of options:  We could do a visitation the night before which would give both you and your friends ample time to share or we could provide a reception for a couple of hours after the funeral.”

THEN SHUT UP

If the family expresses concern over the cost and you feel you need to make compromises then lead them to a larger service and lesser quality merchandise.  (Wow, I said it.  I really am a heretic).

Going back to the “R” word.  Follow this pattern:  Identify several types of customers, list scenarios where your experience could help families do better.  START WITH THE EASY CASES.  As you progress over time and you gain experience with Roleplay start working on your hard cases.  Roleplay is never a one time thing.